Gyarados

The “theme” for this image would have to be THIS, my official gyarados song. And sorry for lateness and such, but I had to time this for a birthday. And the ol’ life is busy excuse…

It’s been quite a while since I’ve drawn a Pokémon that I really like, and it is definitely the first time I’ve drawn one of my all-time three favourite Pokémon from kid-dom, when having a favourite Pokémon seemed really important.

Every single mother loving Pokémon game I’ve ever played, as soon as I could hold a rod, I would catch a magikarp. And I would train it hardcore. That’s the only way to do it, guys. You have to put care, time, faith and love into raising a strong, fierce gyarados. Don’t ever forget the love.

The first Pokémon episode was amazing. When Ash was underwater, I was terrified. When the gyarados charged him, I may have even shit myself. Between Creature from the Black Lagoon and Pokémon, I can’t imagine I will ever be able to get in a large body of water.

From that episode, and that gyarados appearance, I was stunned. Gyarados was hardly well introduced at that point, but it’s size and ferocity intrigued me. I had to watch every episode, because I had to find out more about these rare (to me, back then) and formidable creatures. I think that’s a pretty common theme between my three favourite Pokémon (gyarados, gengar, and kabutops) – rarity, mysery, and coolness/badassness.

Pokémon like gyarados also made me feel really goddam safe as a Canadian, or even just a non-fictional human, because you can’t compare it to anything that exists on Earth. While some kids would have romanticized living in Kanto, Gotham, or Elwood City, I could only dwell on the negative aspects of residing in one of those fictional realms.

1) KANTO – I liked Pokémon. But I also liked school and learning things. I definitely wasn’t going to run away at 10 years old chasing giant, rampaging sea monsters or flying god-creatures, travelling through a massive region by myself. You’re supposed to risk your life alone, travelling city to city, to battle bitchy adults and sketchy trainers with your little pets? The closest I can think of getting to this scenario is if I told my fat-ass cat to attack the thugs who hang out in the alley beside my building. There is (I am not fucking joking) a guy out there who calls himself The Hammer, because he spent 20-something years in jail for beating in a guy’s skull with a hammer. It’s like Gotham City out there.

2) GOTHAM CITY – The only reason I would ever play with the idea of living in Gotham City is so that I could be goddam Robin. But lets at least try to be the smallest bit realistic – I would not cut it as Robin. And if I could, I would not be able to cut it with two dead circus parents. Although – the Batcave, Wayne Manor, training with Batman, everything about Batman going right down to the bat thermos – would probably make up for it. My god, I’m convincing myself this is a good idea. ANYWAY

I would not cut it as Robin. So that scenario dashed, the only thing worth living in Gotham would be to see Batman (or Zatanna, Creeper etc.) running around – but my family just would not cut it in Gotham City. Assuming my overly-Mediterranean family didn’t have strong ties to some crime element, I can’t see that we’d live in any area far from fifty “Hammers” outside our door at any given moment. This would probably raise the chance of some nearby Batman activity, but what are the chances I would get to see this happening? Living in Gotham City would be like the three main residences of my life being moulded into one:  Toronto – Canada’s largest, poorly planned city; Lindsay – small town, teen-pregnancy capital of Ontario full of brain-damaged white trash c**-dumpsters, and Halifax Nova Scotia – boasting a pretty high crime rate itself. I kinda set that up as a joke, but it’s not really. Just facts. Living in Gotham City is not ideal.

3) ELWOOD CITY – I only wrote down Elwood City because three is a comfortable list number, and I get OCD about things like that. It’s also the only other fictional city from my childhood I could recall. As good a city as it was, and as much as I would have loved to be an animal-person-thing when I was a kid, the chance of being in third grade with Mr. Ratburn for 10 years is too high. I wouldn’t risk it.

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In honour not only of gyarados getting posted, but the birthday of two of my best friends, I will give you my favourite search terms that brought people to this site in the last few days!

misty sucking pikachu’s dick, hope meme (what… why?), how to draw porn with pencil, im not gonna raichu a love song (oh that’s clever), mr bean pokemon (THIS is all I found), natasha petras (MY FUCKING NAME!), pokemon poo (geezus) and drawings from ten year olds images (some kind of insult?).

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I am not going to link to any gyarados-banging-misty or shoop da whoop,  just so you know.

COSPLAY

• Well, it’s better than most of the cosplays I’ve linked to.
• This is amazing.
• As half-assed as this is, you have to respect someone in any form of gyarados costume.

AMUSING AND/OR TERRIBLE

• This is pure gyarados rage.
• Pitch Black Crow. Are those supposed to be butt cheeks?
• Adorable painting. Well, as adorable as a gyarados can get.
• Gyarados vs. shellder.
• What’s going on with this gyarados evo?
• Another gyarados evo. At level 55.
• Misty IS gyarados.
• I WANT A TATTOO OF THIS

AMAZING

• Awesome and scary.
• Less scary, still awesome.
• This is wallpaper material.
• All these awesome gyarados arts make me want to draw gyarados again, with some effort put in. One day it will happen.